i just need someone to hug me and just say that they understand. even if they don't. i just need someone to say it and make me believe it. i am tired of trying to make people understand. apparently i am not good at communicating my feelings. but who is? i just need someone to acknowledge them, and say YES. IT IS OKAY FOR YOU TO FEEL THIS WAY.

i want to write about how so stress-free i am but i am afraid i will jinx it.

i
actually
probably
just
did



crap.

i am pretty sure that i totalled my car today.
boo.

so i have an 88.95% in my sociology class.
and she is not going to bump me up.
STUPID
STUPID
STUPID

i got rid of a terrible "friend" yesterday. i feel like a giant weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. i'm really happy that i finally got the courage to just stop being so nice to someone who doesn't deserve it.

i'm trying to minimize the things in my life that are negative and the things that are bringing me down. so far it's going good.

my sister and i are actually getting along. how odd.

my love leaves in september to join the navy. what am i going to dooo?

school's almost out. i'm so proud of myself. i have all a's! and one c, but it's in a&p which is my hardest class.
when i was a nursing major i was going to have to take 18 hours next semester! wtc. way too much. since i've changed it i only have to take 16 and if things go as planned there will be a couple semesters where i'll only be taking 12. whoo!

i changed my major to biology! concentration in pre-physical therapy. yay. less stress for me :)

school is winding down! thank god. i am getting more and more pissy with each day. god bless the sweet souls that are in my life.

i'm not feeling too good today.

i also had to examine my urine under a microscope the other day in lab. YIP YIP!

WHY are they calling for snow in april. seriously.

i slept alllll day yesterday, until like 8:00PM. i thought it would be the biggest mistake of my life but it worked out pretty well.

that she also hocks loogies when she showers.
on the shower floor.
and sometimes, they don't go down the drain.
YEAH.

i love that my public speaking class was accelerated! i took my final today.
so, i told my mom that will and i are going to get an apartment together this summer, and she was okay with it. that night. the next day she emails me and is like "we need to talk more about the apartment thing, call me" and she like completely had turned the tables overnight. it was ridiculous! anyways, i am excited. i am so glad that i do not have to live at home this summer. i would be so incredibly annoyed if i had to move back in after having all of this independence.
i am doing a lot better in school. i have an A in A&P II lab! who knew that was possible? i have a C in lecture though. but whatev. that'll be the only C i have, and if things stay the way that they are i will end up with MAYBE only one B. possibly all A's other than the C. so i am excited!
i have been neglecting my scholarship work hours.
we have to have 75 by the end of the semester, and they say you should aim for 37.5 at midterm, and i don't even have 30 yet :O
oh well, now that i don't have public speaking anymore, i should have a ton more time. plus i have just been lazy and been wanting to take naps when i should be going in there.
will goes to MEPS tomorrow. he will find out if he is able to be a navy SEAL even though he had surgery on his knee. he is nervous. i am flipping out.
i can't believe that my first year of college is almost over! it is insane. i loved every minute of it though! i'm glad i decided to stay at the peay. so many people are transferring back here in the fall.
i'm going to take developmental psych this summer. the only guy who taught it this semester is a douche bag apparently, so i'm taking it with a chick this summer. the only thing i'm worried about is taking it every single day for like two hours.
i am so tired of my suite mate. seriously. she is so incredibly fake. it drives me nuts. i have never met anyone who spends THREE HOURS in the bathroom getting ready in the morning. i LoVe NaTuRe AnD JeSuS aNd WoRkInG oUt AnD sTuDyIng but secretly i am vain as fuck and talk about people who i am supposed to be best friends with behind their back and i am the blondest person in the history of blondes, lolzzzz.
she's a bitch.
anywayssssssss :)
life is good.

my valentine's day was like a movie.
ONLY BETTER

lol great job on that whole oath thing mr. obama

i saw marley & me and bawled my eyes out!

i'm so glad i am back in the dorms agaiiiiiiiin.
my mom and sister are okay if you do not have to live with them, but when you do..

i'm really tired of doing whats expected of me.
my new years resolution was to not care so much about what people think about me, and what people want from me.
this is really hard for me, i don't know why i have such an issue with it.
like when ben's girlfriend called me the other day, after we got off the phone i started crying
because i have never had any problems with anyone
nothing like that has happened to me before
i hate that she hates me
even if it is because she's retarded and think that the world revolves around her
but today i decided i am over it
she was never in my life
and ben has been a jerk to me ever since he started dating her
so i no longer care
but anyways, back to where i was going with this
i have been going back and forth about getting an apartment with my boyfriend this summer
and i can't make up my mind
because my mom is going to say that i am too young, and throw a hissy fit

i don't really think that college is for me
i mean, it's okay i guess
i can do the work
i just don't enjoy it at all really even the social aspect of it
i still hang out with the same people from high school

i really miss justin foster
he is in the navy now
he came home for a couple weeks over christmas
and now he is in hawaii!!!
and he will be there for the next 3 years
he already has his life together

i wish i could get mine straight
figure out what i want to do
dude all i want more than anything is to just be married and have little kids
HOW GAY IS THAT
it kind of pisses me off

i hate girls
especially ones that call me and start screaming at me about how they are going to "beat my fucking ass" if i don't quit talking shit because i am jealous
seriously?
i don't care about you and your boyfriend!!
i have never talked shit about you.
i dated him for two and a half years.
if i wanted him, i would not have broken up with him.
i am not jealous of you.
PS - WE BROKE UP 7 MONTHS AGO

i saw marley and me tonight
and i knew how it'd end pretty much
i still bawled my eyes out

i am so tired of myself and the way i act omg
late new years resolution
beginning now
okay

i have had some very intense conversations with my dad lately. which is really weird because i do not have serious conversations with him EVER. ive come to realize my moms family is severely disfunctional. merry christmas. i have put 800 miles on my car since i got my oil changed which was two weeks ago and i am not even back in tennessee yet. my boyfriend is the sweetest boy in the world. i just want you to know. okay. i got a very gorgeous ring and a necklace for christmas from him! my mom got me socks and the exact pair of sunglasses that i accidentally ran over a few months ago. which was nice, i keep losing all of mine. socks that is. i really wish people would take the time to pick out gifts for meeeeeeeeee, just saying. i hate getting cards for christmas. very impersonal. max got me the warmest gloves i have ever encountered in my life! but the other day i spilled gas on them when i was filling up my car. i am a little scared to wash them. well not really wash, just the drying part scares me. my dad and his wife are on this organic kick and oh my goodness i have never tasted such delicious food in my life. i wish i could afford that stuff. at least my body will look good underground with all of the preservatives i eat unintentionally. i am so glad we have so much time off for break, but it is already going so fast! i don't want to go back to work ever. i have played the wii more than anybody should in their life the past couple days and my arm is actually sore. how gross is that? this is the most retarded entry i think i have ever put in here. my dad built my half sister a dollhouse for christmas! it is so adorable. it has shutters and shingles and siding and everything. i want one haha. i come home tomorrrrrow. i wish life would slow down. i am pretty sure that i HAVE to do better next semester. b's are not going to cut it i don't think. i miss my roommate almost as much as i miss my love. it seems like everybody is going through some weird stuff in their life right now and i have no idea what the hell any of my friends are thinking. they are making strange decisions and i do not have the faintest idea as to why. i am so confused. i wish my sister would stop smoking weed also.

so now that i have way too much free time since we are on break
all i do is play games like amateur surgeon on adultswim.com

lately i am bruising way too easily

statistics blows
i am so glad it is overrrr
no more math for kyrsten!